Author Topic: Momo Matsumoto  (Read 4946 times)

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Momo Matsumoto
« on: December 26, 2016, 10:49:21 PM »
Name:  Momo Hiei Matsumoto

Age:  17. Born Arashi 15th, 63AC

Species and Gender:  Human Female

Symbol:  An orange peach

Occupation:  Full time student at Beacon High scool, 1st year student

Appearance:  Momo Matsumoto is a girl who stands at a stoic 5'10'' tall. She has shoulder length black hair and black eyes on a face of Asian complexion. She wears a pair of semi-rimless glasses, which are a steel grey color. Momo requires her glasses to see. Otherwise, she struggles to see even close objects. therefore, she rarely ever takes them off. Momo wears pink nail polish on her toenails, and Momo's breasts are around the 36D range.

School outfit: Momo wears her school uniform with pride. However, she has made some adjustments to it to fit her liking. She has shortened the skirt so that it only goes down with 4'' between the end and her knee, and her socks only come up to about 6'' before her knee

Casual Wear: Momo is normally seen wearing a white blouse with green lining on her collar and sleeves, a green pleated skirt the same length as her modified school skirt, and her favorite and only shoes: a air of satin black flats with bows and light grey insoles. Momo wears this outfit every day with the exception of school, and washes it before she goes to bed.

Battle Outfit. Momo's battle outfit is an orange blouse with an orang knife pleated skirt and geta flip flops that are about 1" from bottom to the sole of her foot. Momo is fully capapble of fighting in such an outfit and has since her first years of training

History:  Momo Hiei Matsumoto was born to parents Eiji Isoroku Matsumoto and Haruna Kirishima Matsumoto. Momo's family is a middle class family and enjoyed the benefits of wise spending and good banking, as well as Eiji's occupation. Eiji was a professor at a small school in Atlas. However, when Atlas started to mobilize massive armies, Eiji, neutral to war, did nit want to be thrown into it and risk not protecting his family, so Eiji saw it as an opportunity to help enroll 16 year old Momo at Beacon. While Eiji had to use himself as a reputation builder for Momo's letter, she managed to become accepted, and Eiji moved 36 year old Haruna and 16 year old Momo to the Beacon area.

On her 17th birthday, Momo received a present that her parents and grandparents forged in the family forge. Momo received twin swords, one red and one orange, in which she called Dawn and Dusk. The red sword is Dawn and the orange sword is Dusk. Momo has only trained and experimented with these weapons, leaving her to control their power on her own.

Personality:  Momo is often a quiet girl. Although she wants to make friends, her fiery temper often keeps her from having friends, and any friend she has had didn't stay around too long as they switched schools or moved away. Momo has a short fuse and little patience, if somebody offends her or makes her unhappy, she tends to raise her voice and scream angrily. Momo doesn't like to talk casually with other people as it makes her nervous and she never really knows what to say. She has kind of gotten used to the fact that she has no real friends, however, do to the picture bride system that the Matsumoto's have respected, her to-be husband, Erwin Zenzefer III, keeps her happy in times where she feels depressed or exhausted.

Aura and Semblance:  Momo's Aura glows orange. Her Aura was unlocked by a hunter whom was saved from Momo when he was attacked by wild Grimm. Her aura allows her to heal and block unexpected attacks from other biengs, by throwing up and orang peach shield.

Combat Behavior:  Momo is an aggressive fighter, she likes to take charge of the group and be the first one into combat. However, this means that if she needs help, she must rely on the speed of others to help her in danger, otherwise, she might suffer injury. Momo is agile and believes in the principles of precise and tactical striking, therefore allowing her to daze and confuse her enemies, softening the kill for her allies.

WEAPON

Name:  Dawn and Dusk

Primary Form:  Twin swords. Dawn is red, and Dusk is Orange, about 1' in length from the tip of the blade to the base of the grip. The grips, black in color, are about 5''

Secondary Form:  upon the pressing of a button on the bottom of the grip, Dawn and Dusk turn into twin rifles, which fire colored rounds corresponding to their blade colors

Tertiary Form:

Dust Functions:  By inserting red and orange dust into the weapons and firing them at the same time, Dawn and Dusk will spew flame. In a "Cleansing beam" that eradicates anything in its oath up to 50 yards.

History:  Dawn was made by the hands of Eiji Matsumoto and Oda Matsumoto with Dusk created by Haruna Matsumoto and Rin Matsumoto for Momo's 17th birthday, in which are wielded by the 17 year old today. It is said by many that the wielders of these blades will carry the weight of the world
« Last Edit: January 30, 2017, 05:26:45 PM by Dr. Gustave »

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Re: Momo Matsumoto(ready for review)
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2016, 01:19:20 AM »
I thought I was having deja vu for a moment, but nope. We already reviewed this profile. You never responded and it was moved to MiA. Since I'm nice I'm just gonna copy paste the review here.

First, welcome to the RP board! I'll do your first review, but I would like to first apologize if I come off as harsh. I believe in being very blunt and listing all the problems/concerns so they can all be addressed and you can RP faster. That said, let's do this:

Occupation:
Beacon isn't a High School. If anything, Signal Academy would be considered High School and Beacon would be considered College, but both are simply Academies so you'll want to change the description.

History:
Your history is very short...shorter than her appearance descriptions. Please add more detail: talk more about her childhood to help add more details about her so we can better know what she's like and what she's been through.

Personality:This portion of her profile doesn't quite  fit with everything else. If you're going to go heavily on Asian culture, then having her come from Atlas would not match, since Atlas is not a heavily Asian cultured place. Mistral is actually the place that is heavily Asian culture so everything about this character would fit better if she came from Mistral instead of Atlas. Also, if she's going to be a picture bride, then this is details that must be included in her history instead of only mentioned briefly in her personality.

Semblance:
You're going to have to go into more details here:
1. How big of a shield are we talk about?
2. How long does the shield last each time of use?
3. What are the side effects or strains on her if she uses it for too long or too often? There will need to be a few of them.
4. Just so you know this: the shield cannot be unbreakable. There needs to be a breaking point for the shield, so explain what that breaking point is.

Combat Behavior:
I see a lot of strengths and only one possible weakness. There needs to be at least 2-3 weaknesses that offset her strengths. I.E. seeing that she is a close combat fighter, one of her weaknesses can be against a ranged fighter in which she susceptible to taking heavy damage from it.

Weapon:
Fairly cut and dry here...nothing to unique or crazy. I do have a few questions/concerns:
1. Can you please give a little bit of a better description as to how both swords transform into rifles? Doesn't need to be extremely detailed, but a little detail here would help.
2. You have down that it uses orange and red dust. We actually don't go by color dusts here and, instead, we go by element. So fire, lightning, earth, gravity, wind, ice, etc. Those are the types of dust that we go by. That said, please explain what type of dust she will be using by the elements instead of by color.
3. I'll quote it:If you're trying to imply that it's capable of shooting a laser type beam, then you'll either need to REALLY explain how that's possible or cut this off altogether. We've discussed these types of things among the staff on the board and have decided that high-tech type of weapons are only given on a trust basis to those who we know we can trust to not abuse them, since it's been heavily abused in the past. Laser beams falls within the high-tech type of weaponry so, unless you can describe it using dust, then either change the words so it'll fit better or remove it.

That covers it for me. Again, I do apologize if I come off as harsh or rude. I simply want to get your character approved quickly so you can RP faster. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions.
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Re: Momo Matsumoto(ready for review)
« Reply #2 on: January 07, 2017, 03:36:45 PM »
I'm moving this to MIA. If you make ANOTHER profile, I'm just linking you to this.
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Re: Momo Matsumoto(ready for review)
« Reply #3 on: January 29, 2017, 04:01:54 PM »
Name:  Momo Hiei Matsumoto

Age:  17. Born Arashi 15th, 63AC

Species and Gender:  Human Female

Symbol:  An orange peach

Occupation:  Black Belt Teacher of Martial Arts.

Appearance:  Momo Matsumoto is a girl who stands at a stoic 5'10'' tall. She has shoulder length black hair and black eyes on a face of Asian complexion. She wears a pair of semi-rimless glasses, which are a steel grey color. Momo requires her glasses to see. Otherwise, she struggles to see even close objects. therefore, she rarely ever takes them off. Momo wears pink nail polish on her toenails, and Momo's breasts are around the 36D range.

School outfit: Momo wears her school uniform with pride. However, she has made some adjustments to it to fit her liking. She has shortened the skirt so that it only goes down with 4'' between the end and her knee, and her socks only come up to about 6'' before her knee

Casual Wear: Momo is normally seen wearing a white blouse with green lining on her collar and sleeves, a green pleated skirt the same length as her modified school skirt, and her favorite and only shoes: a air of satin black flats with bows and light grey insoles. Momo wears this outfit every day with the exception of school, and washes it before she goes to bed. If forced to fight in this outfit, while she opposes to it strongly, she has the ability to fight effectively in it, and on very rare occasion, will remove her flats, put them in a safe place, normally a purse, and will fight barefoot.

Battle Outfit. Momo's battle outfit is an orange blouse with an orange knife pleated skirt and geta flip flops that are about 1" from bottom to the sole of her foot. Momo is fully capapble of fighting in such an outfit and has since her first years of training, and continues to fight in it.

History:  Momo Hiei Matsumoto was born to parents Eiji Isoroku Matsumoto and Haruna Kirishima Matsumoto. Momo's family is a middle class family and enjoyed the benefits of wise spending and good banking, as well as Eiji's occupation. Eiji was a professor at a small school in Mistral, after being a former revered military leader. However, when Atlas started to mobilize massive armies, Eiji, neutral to war, would not see his little girl drafted for war, so Eiji saw it as an opportunity to help enroll 16 year old Momo at Beacon. While Eiji had to use himself as a reputation builder for Momo's letter, she managed to become accepted, and Eiji moved 36 year old Haruna and 16 year old Momo to the Beacon area.

Momo was never socially accepted. In fact, people would make fun of her looks. Theses insults primarily targeted at the fact that she wears glasses, and even so car as her name. Every night, after whatever she has been doing that day, she would come home, go straight to her room, and she would cry herself to sleep. After her parents found out, they realized she needed a friend or two. Eiji had recommended that they find her a suitable husband who could be there to soothe her pain. The Matsumoto family was deep in their roots and therefore faithfully believed in Asian, primarily Japanese style traditions. Eiji and Haruna reached out to the Germanic House of Zenzefer. Erwin Zenzefer III had received her picture, and sent one in return to the Matsumoto family. Eiji and Haruna had given the picture to Momo, who fell in love with him upon gazing upon the picture. When they had met for the first time, Momo at first was a bit nervous, seeing her 6' tall to-be husband in his former military uniform looking slightly down at the black haired girl. For the first time in 3 years, Momo smiled.

After being inspired by her to-be husband, Momo took up the Martial Arts. Momo, who is proficient in the Jujitsu, Kung-Fu, and even Jeet-Kune-Dom she has earned a black belt in every major Martial Art taught. At this point in Momo's life, she had done this simply for the approval of her family and to-be husband. Both her parents and Erwin, who loved her for who she was already, were extremely proud of her and boasted about her in conferences, special supper invitations, and even so far as school meetings.

Momo wears a pair of satin black ballet flats with bows on the tops and grey insoles. However, since these are the only shoes Momo likes to wear, the grey insoles have started to blacken and wear out, 'molding' to the shape of Momo's soft feet. She wears only flats as they are the closest thing to being barefoot, without showing off too much of her feet, as the sheer perfection of them cause people, including her parents and to-be husband to stare. However, she is so 'loyal' to wearing flats that if told to wear any other shoe, she would rather be barefoot. She sometimes likes to slip out of her flats, not necessarily to show off her perfect feet, but because she does like to be barefoot. Unfortunately, her feet end up back in her flats, as she doesn't like when people stare for a long time. This could possibly be seen as one of her weaknesses, since if her shoe would slip off by accident, she would rather recover her shoe instead of taking the other one off and focusing on the task at hand. One could say she is extremely self-conscious about her feet.

On her 17th birthday, Momo received a present that her parents and grandparents forged in the family forge. Momo received twin swords, one red and one orange, in which she called Dawn and Dusk. The red sword is Dawn and the orange sword is Dusk. Momo has only trained and experimented with these weapons, leaving her to control their power on her own. Although Erwin Zenzefer III is considered the young sword wielding master, even he can only help Momo with basic and advanced combat, as the power inside the swords is too powerful for him, and therefore believes himself to be unworthy of wielding the weapons. Eiji and Haruna have said that the swords were made with the ancient technique and materials of the Matsumoto ancestors, and therefore the true wielder of these weapons is that who rightfully bears the name, and can use their power.

Personality:  Momo is often a quiet girl. Although she wants to make friends, her fiery temper often keeps her from having friends, and any friend she has had didn't stay around too long as they switched schools or moved away. Momo has a short fuse and little patience, if somebody offends her or makes her unhappy, she tends to raise her voice and scream angrily. Momo doesn't like to talk casually with other people as it makes her nervous and she never really knows what to say. She has kind of gotten used to the fact that she has no real friends, however, do to the picture bride system that the Matsumoto's have respected, her to-be husband, Erwin Zenzefer III, keeps her happy in times where she feels depressed or exhausted.

Momo, again, is very self-conscious of her looks, especially her feet. While she enjoys the freedoms of being barefoot, she carries herself with pride as well as being a proper individual, therefore, footwear is a must to her. She loves her flats more than any of her possessions with the exception of her swords, and likes to wear them just about anywhere. Even if she is participating in activities such as running and hiking, her flats are seen on her feet. If she loses one of her flats, whether it is taken off of her foot by somebody like Erwin, or it simply falls from her foot, she will make every attempt to get it back, as before she was given Dawn and Dusk, they were the only things she ever had the opportunity to take care of.

Aura and Semblance:  Momo's Aura glows orange. Her Aura was unlocked by a hunter whom was saved from Momo when he was attacked by wild Grimm. Her aura allows her to heal and block unexpected attacks from other biengs, by throwing up and orange peach shield. This shield protects Momo entirely from up to 10 heavy or unexpected attacks. Upon depletion, the shield can only be recovered after a long period of non-rigorous activity, such as sleeping, simple walking, or even eating.

Combat Behavior:  Momo is an aggressive fighter, she likes to take charge of the group and be the first one into combat. However, this means that if she needs help, she must rely on the speed of others to help her in danger, otherwise, she might suffer injury. Momo is agile and believes in the principles of precise and tactical striking, therefore allowing her to daze and confuse her enemies, softening the kill for her allies. This could also mean that a ranged fighter can cause severe damage to her before she can see the opponent. As mentioned before, if she loses her shoe in battle, she will attempt to get it back instead of worrying about the task at hand. This could prove to be fatal, therefore, she attempts to be very careful when fighting in the footwear she wears in the situation.

WEAPON

Name:  Dawn and Dusk

Primary Form:  Twin swords. Dawn is red, and Dusk is Orange, about 1' in length from the tip of the blade to the base of the grip. The grips, black in color, are about 5''

Secondary Form:  upon the pressing of a button on the bottom of the grip, Dawn and Dusk turn into twin rifles, which fire colored rounds corresponding to their blade colors

Tertiary Form:

Dust Functions:  By inserting red and orange dust into the weapons and firing them at the same time, Dawn and Dusk will fire flaming bullets destroying light and medium skinned opponents. Skinned Being used loosely for armored, scaled, and fleshed foes.

History:  Dawn was made by the hands of Eiji Matsumoto and Oda Matsumoto with Dusk created by Haruna Matsumoto and Rin Matsumoto for Momo's 17th birthday, in which are wielded by the 17 year old today. It is said by many that the wielders of these blades will carry the weight of the world

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Re: Momo Matsumoto(ready for review)
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2017, 05:26:35 PM »
Two things. One, edit your post, don't make a new one in the thread. There's a button here http://puu.sh/tHqrE.png that lets you edit. Two, I won't be addressing the suggestions made in JJ's review because there was something not mentioned in it that supersedes those suggestions. After reading over the profile, this character just does not feel like a character in the world of RWBY. It's more in line with a generic action anime. Which doesn't work. RWBY is a fairly generic show, sure. Outside of some uniqueness, a LOT of it is tropes and borrowed ideas done in a way to make them interesting and that's not a bad thing. But the problem lies in that if you take a character from, say, Naruto and put them in, say, Dragonball... it won't work. And the same problem lies here in that this character feels like something outside of RWBY.
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Re: Momo Matsumoto
« Reply #5 on: February 10, 2017, 05:37:12 PM »
I am leaving this here, because you'll PROBABLY be back. If/when you come back, edit the main post, fix the profile, and send someone a PM to alert them.
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Re: Momo Matsumoto
« Reply #6 on: February 14, 2017, 01:45:05 PM »
doing a quick reply to show my activity is still in existance

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Re: Momo Matsumoto
« Reply #7 on: March 06, 2017, 03:22:32 PM »
Moving to MIA, since the WIP one is more recent...

... And no less stupid...