RWBYFanon v5
RPG Creations => Character Creation => WiP Characters => Topic started by: Greyson Yin on December 16, 2016, 10:37:22 PM
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Name: Greyson Yin
Age: 17
Species and Gender: Male Black Fox Faunus
Symbol: A gray diamond with two swords cutting through it (left) Black (right) White
Occupation: 1st year student Shade Academy, Assassin-for-Hire
Appearance: Greyson was born very strangely as he grew up throughout the years his hair was always white and spiky with black frosted tips which was recommended by a friend. He has fox ears that are a deep black color but his left ear has a small cut on the side of it. His skin is a tanned white color and his eyes are a deep blueish-green color. He is about 6,1 and weighs 154 lbs. He is mostly seen wearing a white short sleeved sweatshirt that always seems to get some kind of stain from battle damage with his symbol on the front right pocket with thick dark gray pants that have a black and white patterned bandage on the left leg. He also wears a belt that can hold up to 1-4 ammunition clips but he mostly uses 3. He also wears a necklace that has a small katana pendant that has been passed down in his family for generations which was given to him by his father gave to him when he was 8 years old.
History: Greyson's was born in a small town that was inhabited by assassins in Vacuo and lived there for about 15 years where he was trained by his father to become an assassin like his father and his ancestors before him you could say that it's almost like a family business. After he turned 16 his town was invaded by a horrible grimm attack which caused the death of his mother and father seeing them beheaded in front of his eyes by an unusual looking Beowulf causing him to go into a fury that unlocked his semblance which he used causing him to blank out and killed all the grimm throughout his hometown which also caused him to do excessive area damage forcing everyone else alive in the town to evacuate. After 2 days of being unconscious he had woken up in the center of town where they had held events, shops, and was full of people but was now a grave yard to the victims of the grimm attack. As he walked through the area he saw that the town was highly damaged, it looked like a ghost town from his point of view, not knowing what had happened he came across his house only to see that it had been reduced to rubble. As he walked through he saw all his memories flashing back to him all the good and bad times. He left his hometown which was now ancient history and wandered the deserts of Vacuo and went from town to town doing odd jobs and some assassinations while also trying to collect information on what happened but sadly had no luck. One day he was hired by an anonymous person to assassinate someone who the anonymous person had quarreled with. When Greyson arrived to the location he was given only to find the headmaster of Shade Academy who offered him a place into his school and was told that in return for graduating and becoming a huntsman he'd be told what happened to his hometown in every solid detail.
Personality: Greyson isn't much of a talker, ever since the incident he keeps to himself and doesn't usually want anything to do with anyone which makes him look like he's always calm (particularly humans considering the fact he's a Faunus)
Aura and Semblance: Greyson's Aura is a deep steel gray color and his semblance is almost like a mix of blake and sun wu kongs semblances he can use his shadow but is only limited to using it about 10 times per week but if he goes past that he gets nauseous and it seriously affects his fighting movements.
Combat Behavior: He tends to fight with the style of a ninja making him light and quick on his feet but there are times if he fights too much grimm he gets extremely pissed and uses his weapon in its secondary form which starts to make him become reckless which can also make him vulnerable but he would take a few hits and would give them back but harder.
WEAPON
Name: Yinkai
Primary Form: a light weighted katana that has a white handle with a black circle pattern on it that is about 27.3cm with a black blade that measures up to about 77.3cm that can be powered up with fire dust, when he uses it to fight he usually holds it reverse handed. He keeps it in a sheathe on his back wherever he goes.
Secondary Form: When Yinkai enters this form it turns into a full auto uzi that is white with a black barrel and is about 3.5 kg and has a barrel length of 10.2 in and uses .22 LR bullets its magazines can hold up to 45 bullets.
Tertiary Form: There are times when Greyson doesn't even need to unsheathe his sword so he locks the sheathe onto the blade and will just fight with it as if it were like a bokken.
Shuriken: Greyson usually carries these in a small pouch that can hold up to 50 shuriken and is held onto the bandage on his leg and though they're mostly used for distractions Greyson has found ways to combine them with dust and use them as a offensive type weapon one half has steam dust and the other has ice.
Dust Functions: When Yinkai is in its primary form Greyson uses fire dust which causes the blade to engulf in flames where he then begins to attack with swift strikes. When Yinkai enters its secondary form its dust element switches as well to steam and wind elements but it also allows him to still use fire, when he puts steam dust into action it works somewhat like a smoke bomb causing the area to fog up he only needs 30 bullets to do this but the price for this is his opponent(s) can't see him and he can't see them he predicts where his enemy is and focuses his aim towards where they are by detecting the sounds of their movements and relies on those last 15 bullets before reloading, when he puts wind dust to action the dust will cause the bullets to accelerate but in doing this the bullets become dull and operate more like a rubber ball that causes a huge knockback effect to whoever or whatever it hits, and finally when he puts fire dust into play it will set the bullets on fire and can sometimes cause a small explosion on contact.
History: Greyson created his weapon with his father they had been working on it ever since he turned 13 it resembles his great grandfather's weapon but with different functions but he still tends to make minor upgrades and experiment with different dust elements at times.
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Hey man, welcome to the board.
Leader of Team GAME
This is something that's decided once the character is approved, you put him on a team with other peoples characters and you don't decide now that he'll be the leader.
He has white spiky hair with black frosted tips
That's...pretty much the exact opposite of how frosted tips work. Is his hair bleached? White hair isn't exactly standard.
black eyes
Why? Why would he have black eyes?
He is about 6,3 and weighs 113 lbs
This is extremely unhealthy, very underweight. That's what I'd expect from a cancer patient in chemo, not someone at the peak of their physical ability. I recommend you look up a height/weight chart to see what's healthy and what isn't.
His body is one like an assassins so he's ready for anything
This doesn't really mean anything, what is an assassins body like? How does that make him ready for anything? I'd just cut it
15 years where he was trained by his father to become an assassin
Ugh, another assassin. Afaik there's nothing actually in the rules against it, but just know that it's been done to death and will earn you a shitty reputation as generally they're written really poorly, so regardless of how good of a writer you actually are, there's a stigma.
So his father trained him, is his dad an assassin too? Why do they live in a small town then, where I'm assuming there would be relatively few assassinations and where everyone would recognize him.
a fury that unlocked his semblance which he used to destroy his hometown.
Why the hell would he destroy an entire town, instead of the Grimm that attacked. Also, a character powerful enough to destroy towns isn't going to be passed as a first year.
He stumbled upon the headmaster of Shade Academy and was accepted in where he was put into team GAME
How soon was this after the town destruction? Are you saying that the headmaster saw a vicious, horrible murderer and thought "Hey, let me bring this guy into my school full of children." That makes no sense.
semblance allows him to control the powers of Yin and Yang itself
Nope. This isn't allowed.
Primary Form: a light weighted katana that can be powered up with fire dust he keeps it in a sheathe on his back wherever he goes.
Secondary Form: a 40k Bolter that uses Shuriken as ammunition he can power up the shuriken with steam and wind dust.
Dust Functions: Wherever Greyson is he can use any of his dust elements but in some places their functions work better than others.
Fire katana seems okay, though once again pretty overdone. In the dust section you need to say what function the dust actually has "makes the blade covered in flames" for example.
For the secondary form, afaik you can't just say a '40k Bolter' as that's ripping off something else. Also shurikens are a horrible ammo, how are they stored? How many does he have? How does the gun actually fire shurikens? And how the hell does a katana turn into a gun that fires shurikens? You need to at least somewhat describe the transition. I'd just scrap the entire secondary form, every single piece of it needs serious revision.
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I'm just curious what do you mean by 'control the powers of yin and yang themselves.' I'm no Taoist but I'm pretty sure their thing is yin and yang make up everything. If it was a personal thing like some gnostic conquering self thing it'd be pretty cool but I can't image how that would destroy the village.
And like who trains a kid to be an assassin? Creative freedom and all that but like seriously.
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I'd go into more detail about what's with Greyson's father teaching him to be an assassin. Particularly if it's a family thing, like are they defending something or is it just the family business.
Semblances are outward expressions of the soul or whatever so it should line up somewhat with Greyson himself. Maybe something to do with entropy or shadows? Maybe it's more effective against Grimm because they are just shadows or whatever.
Combat Behaviour is also supposed to include any weaknesses, and getting angry isn't really a weakness. Perhaps he is reckless, willing to take a few hits to give a few more back? Maybe his training under his father was too rigid and as such Greyson struggles to adapt his style for unusual threats and can even become predictable.
But yea major step up.