[kkuhl98]

CHARACTER

Name: Shamus Rechin

Age: 19

Species and Gender: Shark Faunus and Male

Symbol:

Occupation: First year student at Beacon and Sailor

Appearance: A 5ft tan man that is ripped. wears nothing but shorts and sandals and has Polynesian tattoos that glow with some dust.  His Faunus trait is that he has the teeth and gills of a Shark, his teeth regrow in  a day. his voice deep and smooth and has no hair on his face which is handsome. his eyes are blue and has black hair that is done in a surfer style. he is tan as expected when you live on the sea.

History: A boy that lived on the sea with other water based Faunus learning to fish and kill water Grimm, this is where he learned to be a amazing straightest to plan ahead or else they could die from the weather or a grim. He deiced to become a Huntsman so that he could kill the strongest water Grimm that he has ever seen the Bakunawa, a Multi head sea grim that he saw when he was 12 and saw it Destroy most of his family ships, so he decide to go to Beacon Academy where it is his first year. he scored high when it can to fighting ability and adaptability but was horrible at respecting others ideas and failing at actually learning things. His favorite thing to do is fish and love eating anything that comes from the sea. he is hate the dessert for that lack of water and fish.

Personality: A man that is one part calm and wise warrior and one part funny and pervy man. He would would fight a bear and would say " i can BEAR-ly believe it. and if he see a women he would drop what he is doing to hit on her even during a fight, but then can plan out a perfect strategy on how to take out any Grimm in minutes on the fly. He has a fear of the desert for it's lack of water. He loves seafood and salty food.

Aura and Semblance: a blue Aura and the semblance is Water hit, all water makes him stronger the longer he is in it and the more he drinks an example of his strength is that he can throw a Atlesian Paladin 20 Feet at max strength.. The only problem is that his body can only handle so much strength until it breaks and when is not around water he starts to get weak until he dies. he can only go for 1 day with out water.

Combat Behavior: Crush, Slash, Tear, Bite, Anything to get the job done, if his enemy flies he will ump up to them with his semblance and if they are far away he will throw his weapon at this enemy. his weakest point is that he can't handle heat and a lack of water.

WEAPON

Name: Pāku'i Hua

Primary Form: A Polynesian war ax with Shark teeth

Secondary Form: The Teeth shoot out in a half circale pattern in a 15 ft Radius and the Teeth can be replaced by any kind of metal or Harden Dust.

Dust Functions: It has water dust inside of it so he can use it in an emergency

History: The Pāku'i Hua was a old weapon used by his family for years with some change from each owner.

[Vision]

First off welcome to the site Kkuhl This is a nice starting point though other than the basic info (name through occupation) each part needs to be in greater detail, head on over to the approved characters board to get an idea of what is expected.

Some brief pointers on what you have now:

• What school does he go to? What year?
• What shark features does he have?
• Specify that it is a grimm sea dragon that he just refers to as Bakunawa (And as such it matches its ability rather than our worlds mythological dragon). Has he seen it himself or is it merely a legend to him?
• What are his weaknesses in combat?

Best of luck moving forward ^^ And we'll give some tips from what we see.

[Kingnoname1]

Just a heads up we won't know that you have made any changes unless you post as such in the thread. As for further advice I'd recommend checking out the sites discord, link https://discord.gg/Es2GCj4, which might be useful to quickly clear up any specifics you are unsure about. As for character itself try to be as descriptive as possible. Hair? Eyes? Facial hair? How does he hold himself? What does he sound like? How is he calm/wise? How is he funny/pervy? Is he both at the same time or do they switch? If so, why do they switch? Hobbies? Likes/dislikes? How well does he do at school? What affect did his families death him personally? What can he do with water manipulation? How much does it take out of him? ect ect

I do like the weapon and the general idea but you are going to need more if you want the other other mods to approve it.

[kkuhl98]

I edit it is it good yet.

[Kingnoname1]

You still need a more details. What was his early childhood like? What did affect did his early childhood have on him? What year is he in at Beacon? What is his relationship to his surviving family members? Why is be bad at team work? Why is he bad at 'learning things?' Why is he good a strategy and not learning things?

It's better to have too much than too little so I'd spend a little time brainstorming all the different facets of the character, how he developed them? And how they affect his day to day life.

Water manipulation of water inside someone isn't going to be allowed, it's an auto hitting ability that's really strong. Correction it might be allowed if there are heavy restrictions liking needing an open wound or something. Correction mark II, No water manipulation of people it's a too powerful an ability for your first character. The duration is also pretty long, fights usually only last 5-10 minutes and if you can keep it up throughout the entire fight there is no point in having a duration. Maybe having a cool-down timer might be a good compromise, has to be off for X amount of time after being used for Y.

You seem to have made a bit of a contradiction with character traits. You say that he is really wise and can form the perfect strategy on the fly but his main weakness is he doesn't think things through.

[kkuhl98]

I did more editing.

[Kingnoname1]

So I'm just going to repeat the things that you clearly missed in my last post.

• What Year is he in?
• Why is he good at strategy and not learning things?
• In combat behaviour talk about how he deals with certain types of fighters. He has no range options so how does he deal with being kited, stuff like that.

I do like the new semblance more but I am curious to why you don't seem to want to add detail.

[kkuhl98]

I did say what year he is a first year.

[Kingnoname1]

put it in the occupation, he is a first year beacon student